Just Ask A Women
No matter how confident you are, putting yourself out there is a big risk—because getting turned down stings. In fact, a slew of recent research has shown that social pain—the emotional response you have from being rejected or ostracized by others—actually shares some of the same neural and neurochemical substrates as physical pain.
In other words, similar things are happening in your brain when you stub your toe and the person you like turns you down. This is largely why rejection is painful—so painful that you may end up avoiding asking people out altogether or act so nonchalant and non-committal that the person you're asking out doesn't even know if it's a date or not.
This is no way to be. You need to be direct, bold, and confident when asking someone out. If the idea of asking a person out sounds confusing or horrifying, not to worry. We have all the information you need right here: Everything you need to know about asking someone out in a way that will leave you feeling OK, no matter the answer. Whether over an app, text, or in-person—we have the tips you need to score that date or at least try. Here is how to ask someone out without, you know, being weird about it.
One of the biggest relationship problems men face is a fear of rejection. Kristie Overstreet , a clinical sexologist and psychotherapist. This fear and worry keep us from taking healthy risks such as putting ourselves out there. This type of thinking happens to protect our ego and from getting hurt.
Is That Normal? We all do it. One answer to this is to do your research before negotiating. Reach out to people in your network to find out what a fair salary is. You can also do online research to find out what the industry standards are. In the end, the very act of negotiating can lead to better outcomes.
And your goal is not only more money. Instead of a higher salary, you may negotiate for more remote work , stock options, maternity leave, bonuses, and other important things. Women are strong in collaborative negotiation Negotiations, in the traditional sense, often means taking the opposite position from the other person in an issue. This is an all-or-nothing and zero-sum game style of negotiation that rarely has positive outcomes.
Women do have strong negotiating skills that often manifest when asking for something that benefits other people or a group. Negotiation experts Roger Fisher and William Ury encourage people to stop taking a position against the other party in a deal. What if we flipped the question? What if our incessant preoccupation with problems and challenges continues to marginalise their voices, suppresses their strengths and sense of ownership, restricting women from achieving their true potential?
What if we instead focused on unleashing energies that enable them to be enterprising — to be at the forefront of economic activities and also, in turn, reform the very system — to include many more by recognising unpaid work? Collectivisation remains the backbone of most economic empowerment initiatives, and for good reason. The process creates safe spaces for women to build upon their innate strengths.
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