You Ll Find Love
There is a belief in society that giving up on finding love is the key to finding it. Or, the more common way to say it is, "Love will find you when you least expect it. There are actually cases for both sides of the argument. It's another thing to obsess about it. What's the difference? Looking for Love If you are going to go out and look for love, it means that you are actively searching for the right person.
You remain open to meeting new people, going on dates, and seeing if you can find someone who you have a connection with.
Looking for love involves positive energy. You are eager to find the one person who you can spend your life with. It's an exciting experience and one that doesn't cause you too much stress. You have realistic expectations of what you are looking for.
Obsessing About Finding Love If you have crossed the line from looking to obsessing, your experience will look a little different. Instead of positive energy, you are putting out negative energy. You might struggle with the idea that you aren't "enough" so long as you're not in a serious relationship. Some people who are obsessed with finding love also have an unrealistic expectation of what they're looking for.
If you're like this, you might be looking for a fairy tale. This makes it difficult for you to find love because no one is able to meet what you're looking for.
When you have reached this point, it's going to be more difficult to find love. Others who are obsessed with finding love rush into relationships. They are so desperate to "find love" that they end up dating people that they shouldn't, which leads to heartbreak eventually.
Right," then you might need to step back. Giving up on finding love can be just the thing that you need to correct your course. If you are so concerned about finding love, you might struggle with your feelings of self-worth.
If you are feeling bad about who you are because you aren't in a relationship, then it's something that you should address before trying to find love. Having healthy self-esteem can go a long way in helping you to find a romantic partner. If you don't know how to love yourself, then you are going to struggle with knowing how to love other people, as well. You don't have to look at this as giving up on finding love, but simply stepping back or taking a break. There is a lot more to life than being in a relationship.
Take some time to step back and focus on all of those things. Enjoy the things that you can do because you aren't in a serious relationship. Why You Should Keep Looking for Love The other side of the story is that you won't find love if you aren't looking for it. What if you were hungry and you wanted something to eat? You knew there was food out there, but you decided to take a hands-off approach.
And nothing will ever compare to your ex. All their past relationships end in disaster. Many people do have repetitive relational patterns. This is often tied into some early childhood attachment wounding that usually requires psychotherapy to heal. Betrayal trauma such as infidelity or being left for someone else can cause deep scars.
Everyone has their karmic lessons, but they are seldom life sentences. With that said, here are ten solid reasons to feel hopeful if you are asking: will I ever find love again? You can get over your ex, you just need to know how. It takes more than just time to get over the past. There actually are strategies that you can practice to help you be proactive in your healing. Learn how to twist out your built up tension and release your stress with your breath by applying these simple practices.
They will help you feel lighter and more positive all the way around. Or if your ex was dishonest, then integrity will be something that is a must have next time.
You can change your repetitive relational patterns to improve your relational skill set. Physical attractiveness is not a requirement for love. You may believe that you are not good looking enough for someone else to find you attractive. Again, it falls to me to tell you how wrong you are. Physical attractiveness is not the be all and end all of life, nor of love.
People of all shapes, sizes, and looks find love. There is no barrier here but the one in your mind. The physical side of things is only one part of the overall package of attraction, and not even the most important part. Stop placing so much importance on looks — yours and theirs.
Look beyond the surface to what really matters. Other people want to see you happy — let them help you. I promise you, there are plenty of people in this world who want to see you happy and in love. Never forget that they are here to help you find love. They are your wingmen and wingwomen — sometimes in the flesh, but most importantly in the support and encouragement they provide. Being optimistic about finding love will come a lot more naturally if you lean on other people and listen to what they are telling you — namely that you will find it if you keep searching.
Ask them to help you with your small talk, your dating chat, your confidence, your dating profiles, your date outfits even. Ask them to set you up with friends or people they know. Ask them to give you a little push now and again if you feel like giving up on love.
Your fear can motivate you. Perhaps the turning point for you will be to realize that fear can be used to push your forward just as powerfully as it can be used to hold you back. This new fear will actually make you brave. It will give you that little push you need to say hello, start a conversation, tell a joke, flirt a little, make a move, and do all of the other things that go into forming a loving relationship with someone.
You can shape your own life. How would you do things differently? Would you give more of your love to family and friends?