You Ve Been In Love Too Long
For some, falling in love happened immediately, and for others, it took much longer. We worked for the same company, and because of that, it took us a little longer than normal for our relationship to progress—but that was a great thing! Especially considering my relationships in the past tended to move very quickly from dating to a serious relationship. We got engaged after nine. One week! It totally freaked me out because I would never say it that quickly, but I did say it back after we had been dating for a month.
Now, eight and a half years later, it all worked out! It was a word that I felt I really needed in my life and in my partner. I met him in Vegas I know, I know and we hung out for approximately 24 hours. Fast forward a couple months, and he came and visited me one weekend, then again, and again, and I fell in love with everything about him.
It was at a community college where we had two classes together. I fell in love with her the first month of dating, probably three weeks into dating her. We have never broken up or separated, and I feel like it was the perfect amount of time for us to fall in love. For me, it was love at first sight. Just be sure to pay attention to how your interactions make you feel. If you feel someone is judging you or your choices, or making you feel bad in other ways, it may be wise to limit your time with them.
Spend time on yourself When you feel head over heels in love, you might make small or not so small changes to your appearance or personality to align with what you think they want in a partner.
Consider those parts of yourself you might have denied, pushed down, or altered. Or perhaps you avoided fully expressing your emotions and stopped asking for what you needed. Do you feel comfortable with those changes? You may want to avoid contacting the person unless you really need to, like if you share custody of children or work together. You might want to maintain your friendship.
But consider waiting until the intensity of your love fades. Otherwise, you may end up causing yourself unnecessary pain. Here are some tips to help you through this period: Have patience with yourself. Practice self-compassion by telling yourself what you might tell a friend in the same situation.
She recommends therapy as a helpful resource when you: have a hard time living your life as you typically would feel confused about your feelings find yourself in a dark place have trouble acknowledging or accepting your feelings Therapy provides a safe, nonjudgmental space to explore emotions and talk through strategies for productively addressing them.
A therapist can also teach you coping skills to manage these feelings until the intensity lessens. The bottom line Humans are unique beings with complex emotions. You may always carry those feelings with you in some form. Watch more from the Youth in Focus video series Crystal Raypole has previously worked as a writer and editor for GoodTherapy.
Her fields of interest include Asian languages and literature, Japanese translation, cooking, natural sciences, sex positivity, and mental health. Last medically reviewed on January 14, 4 sourcescollapsed Healthline has strict sourcing guidelines and relies on peer-reviewed studies, academic research institutions, and medical associations. We avoid using tertiary references.
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